Monday, April 29, 2013


Alex or Big A’s dreadlocks fall below his shoulders. With a new tattoo on his ass and the west coast rave clothes, he might be 42 but he is still cool.  He thought about putting a teardrop under his eye but the old man said he would cut him off from his funds if he got a tattoo on his face.

Just a regular trustafarian peacock at a prominent film festival, Big A goes to any party he wants. It is late in the evening, Thursday night, and the party is slow. Some crazy fools get up in the morning to watch films. Alex and his crew watch the end of the night movie and then PARTEH! All the players, hangers, climbers, backstabbers, lovers, haters, dancers, singers, you name it show what they got to one another.

In walks this redneck, the crowd is already subdued and the background noise drops another decibel. Sandy red hair cropped short, reddened skin, a beak of a nose untouched by a scalpel, his blue green eyes contract as if absorbing all that he sees. 

"Alright folks, what did you think?” the man says.

The hot chick to his left hops off the bar stools and sashays to the rube. Alex had his eye on her. He had turned and winked at her and got a little smile. When he finished scanning the crowd, he was going to talk to her.

The server walks past him to the rustic yokel.

A clean-cut black dude walks in with a woman who is probably his wife. She is wearing a corsage. Is this an alien invasion or 1956? You would think they could spend a little money on clothes.

“How did you get invited to this party?” Big A bellows as he swaggers up to the odd group.

“Make a good movie and if the sun is shining bright, a door will open for you boy.”

31 comments:

  1. Jim Morrison is said by some to be still alive. Maybe that is the door that will open for you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Some folks think Elvis hasn't left the building either. lol, I have never been cool a day in my life.

      Delete
  2. 42 and still cool ... that's me! hahaha

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. My kind of man, make it up as you go. he he he.

      Delete
  3. Poor Alex! I don't think anyone will be appreciating that new tattoo;)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I know. laughs It's hard to be original when everyone else is doing it.

      Delete
  4. Nicely done, haha. I particularly like the part about his almost-realized face tattoo, except that his old man (who must be literally an old man at this point) would cut him off.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Good thing Alex has dear old dad. He needs someone to help him rein it in until father time does it for him. I remember this old man wearing tons of gold chains trying to hang out with us during my college days. It's hard to be cool when your body prefers relaxed fit Levi jeans.

      Delete
  5. This is an interesting piece. Just be careful--Trifecta accepts the prompt word only in the form given. So maybe the plural form of door in your last line could be edited to the singular form?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Fixed it. Although I am a long way from being a contender. I enjoy reading everybody else's post and creating a story. I was a science teacher. Language arts are so good at detail which I am not.

      Delete
  6. Great style, atmosphere and absolutely wonderful first line!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks. I have never been cool but I know what it looks like. laughs.

      Delete
  7. Poor Alex...he thinks he's cool :) I like that the 'redneck' busted into the 'to be seen' crowd.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It is nice to see the underdog come out on top.

      Delete
  8. Trustifarian peacock...I love it!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I would like to claim it but it is urban slang. I understand these types are prominent at the South by Southwest film festival. Hence the idea for story. It is ironic they get a better seat than the people who create.

      Delete
  9. 42 and still living off the old parents! Not a good way to be! Not that I'm much better!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I know. I wouldn't mind the comfort of having a trust fund but it is like never growing up to not support yourself.

      Delete
  10. Suddenly my low-key, partyless life seems much more attractive! Great dig, Ann!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. While surfing the web, I read an article about social climbing. People who would spend all they have to emulate the trustafarian peacocks at SXSW. All I could think was why. I have never been a part of such a high life.

      Delete
  11. I loved it - even though I felt it coming.

    small typo "he was going to talks to her."

    (RogRites)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks. Substance versus shadow, what else would a writer choose.

      Delete
  12. I loved the trustafarian peacock. Where do you get this stuff? Great read.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Honestly, an article on the web about social climbing. Thanks.

      Delete
  13. This is such a fun piece Ann! You've done such a good job painting your character. Well done!

    ReplyDelete
  14. I really like how you've created this whole "scene" with the hipsters and hangers-on and the rest of the crowd. Great writing.!

    ReplyDelete
  15. That beak of a nose was a nice touch.

    ReplyDelete
  16. I'm glad his dad said ixnay to the teardrop tattoo. He didn't need it anyway! :D

    ReplyDelete
  17. I loved the writing style! What characters too!

    ReplyDelete
  18. Ha!ha!Loved the tongue in cheek digs you took society's facetious people who pretend to be someone else & how money makes most people "acceptable"-great take Ann:-)

    ReplyDelete
  19. I really like the way you showed Alex, you gave so much information on him in such a short space. I really enjoyed it. LM x

    ReplyDelete

Your thoughts.