In Georgia, lawmakers have on more than one occasion discussed teachers having weapons in classrooms. We made incredible progress in Georgia but legislators have been busy improving the system. So education is taking a predictable nosedive.
This makes me think of a class that would take the teacher's Skinny Dip perfume out of her purse and spray it all over the room. The teacher would wake up and inquire who took her Skinny Dip. This was 1969. Supposedly she was drunk was the story. I never noticed her drunk and made an A in her class.
I cannot remember the subject of the class but I can tell you we sat down and talked the entire hour in our assigned seats of course. Any classwork was welcome to break the boredom. We got a magazine thing every few weeks. You could hear a fly buzz we were so occupied reading that thing and doing the crossword in the back.
I didn't allow kids to talk in the classroom. Imagine a kid that would not stop talking. The teacher would pull her gun and flip back the trigger and boom. I told you to stop talking!
The teacher would calmly push the Public Address system in the room and request the custodian to clean up the vomit from a few of the children and the school nurse with smelling salts for the student who thought they were the target. Those kids would be quiet. That is what shock can do for you.
What the custodian had been shot! You mean your warning shot had gone into the storage closet at the exact moment he was retrieving paper towels and liquid soap for the girls room.
You know they weren't delivering them to the boy's room. Yesterday, the boys flooded the bathroom with paper towels in the sink and emptied the soap containers. Every male in the school would enter and glide from wall to wall. The custodian caught the young history teacher gliding with his students and sent them all back to class.
I had tried to stop telling people I was a teacher. I retired in 2007 and 2010. At this point, I doubt I could control a class of children. Slack would not be the word for my approach. I can now sleep sitting up for about five minutes. I sort of know why the window of opportunity opened for the Skinny Dip caper.
But one time during a teacher work day, I jumped and hit the top of a high doorway like the kids. Those same kids who were told not to do that. On landing, I see another teacher. She just laughed at me. I can understand the history teacher gliding with the kids.
Despite the efforts of the legislature and the six gun salute curriculum that just happens to be exactly like that horrible common core curriculum and tests that evaluate whether teacher's cheat and whether students happen to know whatever hit the fancy of the governor, the kids are alright and the teachers are most days. But please, don't give them guns.
And some of this is made up. Hey, who stole my Skinny Dip?